Knowing what you value will help you build the most meaningful life possible.

Posted February 16, 2023 | Reviewed by Michelle Quirk

A seemingly forgettable experience I had with a friend has left an indelible imprint on my memory. I lived in New Orleans for most of the 1990s. One Saturday, my friend and I met for lunch in the French Quarter. Afterward, we walked over to a local park where a neighborhood festival was underway.

The park took up one city block, so, as festivals go, this one was small. But there were several vendor booths, a few food tents, and a brass band playing Dixieland music. It was a beautiful spring day. We grabbed soft drinks at a food tent and sat down to cool off.

I was taking in the spectacle—people of all ages and races milling around, children playing, dogs of various kinds on leashes, and, last but not least, the brass band. After about five minutes, my friend said, “This is boring.”

I don’t know what he was expecting, but his statement made quite an impression on me. I was not then a psychologist, but somehow I knew that he had just revealed more about himself than he realized. Sitting there, I could entertain myself with whatever experiences were available. He could not.

The power to find something interesting about an autumn leaf, a cluster of clouds, a cat sunning itself, or two kids throwing a frisbee in a park is the power of imagination, curiosity, meaning, and possibilities. Monica Parker calls it The Power of Wonder , the title of her new book.

Parker, founder of the international consulting firm Hatch Analytics, has a background spanning management and the arts, and she holds an MSc (Distinction) from Queens University Belfast in organisational behaviour. She takes a multidisciplinary approach to understanding how we wonder and why we should. Whether addressing her topic in terms of neuroscience, psychology, philosophy, or metaphysics, Parker makes the case that our capacity for wonder can enliven our existence and help us find meaning and renewal.

Our capacity for wonder is directly linked to our personal openness to new experiences. Openness is a trait included in the five-factor model of personality: conscientiousness, agreeableness, neuroticism, openness, and extraversion (“CANOE” or “OCEAN”). Each of these traits exists on a continuum from low to high. Parker cites Paul Silvia, professor of psychology at University of North Carolina, Greensboro, who said, “People low in openness to experience…are more conventional, practical, and down-to-earth.” These characteristics tend to suppress wonder.

T he Power of Wonder first explores the different ways in which we wonder—through attention, through distraction, and through concentration. Parker calls our attention to things that make us go “Wow!” as well as those that force us to cry “Whoa!” She speaks of “compression and release,” using the example of Frank Lloyd Wright’s architecture. Parker visited Taliesin and described the experience of emerging from Wright’s narrow, constricted hallways into breathtaking rooms of light. I’ve never visited Taliesin, but I have visited Fallingwater. I had a similar reaction when climbing dark, constricted stairways and emerging into rooms that seemingly brought the light and natural landscape right inside. (See: Fallingwater: Where Design, Structure, and Psychology Converge.)

The book’s second section deals broadly with the application of wonder. Parker notes that

some researchers believe the act of viewing…the Mona Lisa as a piece of art in the Louvre as opposed to seeing a print of the Mona Lisa on a sweatshirt—activates a specific type of schema in our mind, making us more open and curious as we experience the work through our ‘art schema’ rather than within our ‘day-to-day schema.’

In a nutshell, that’s wonder practiced in real time—simply being aware of qualitative differences. Wonder is knowing that Mona Lisa on a sweatshirt is aesthetically different than viewing the original painting—and yet still being able to appreciate the sweatshirt for what it is.

The Power of Wonder concludes with a section on the immediate and long-term benefits of putting our capacity for openness, curiosity, and synthesis of experience to work. Here Parker deals with the pomp and ritual of religion and the psychologically restorative power of wonder, and she even delves into the mind-altering effects of psychedelics. Practicing the art of wonder requires slowing down and taking notice. It requires patience and pondering. What we give up in quantity of frenetic activities, we make up for in richness of experience.

This is not a book to be devoured in a weekend. Like a bottle of wine, it is to be sipped and savored. Each page is packed with insightful and thought-provoking ideas. Read a chapter before going to bed and sleep on it. The next day, reflect on what you’re read and practice applying Parker’s ideas and advice in your own way. You may find that the wonder years are still ahead.

He who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead; his eyes are closed. —Albert Einstein

© Dale Hartley—I invite you to connect with me on social media.

Dale Hartley is a retired professor of business and psychology. His book, Machiavellians: Gulling the Rubes," will be released in September, 2023.

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Knowing what you value will help you build the most meaningful life possible.